The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Randomize
