Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Randomize