If that was your dad, he is hot
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Randomize
