Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Randomize
