I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Randomize
