Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Well I just put wine in my tea
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
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