She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
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