she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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