Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
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