Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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