All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
