O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
