..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
where am i from again
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Randomize
