What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Just puked most of my soul out..
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
