I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
