in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
