big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Randomize
