I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
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