Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
All I want is dick and wine.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
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