I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
