More tranny stories later!
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
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