We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
