Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Randomize
