Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
So much rum. So many feels.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
