Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
