you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
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