So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Randomize
