I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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