So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
Randomize
