sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
