Can Purell be used as lube?
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
