I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
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