Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
