Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Randomize
