she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
