What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize