Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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