Cold hands, warm shart.
sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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