the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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