just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Randomize
