I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
My dick has a subreddit
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
