No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
