This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
thus making me awesome and them whores
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Randomize