haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
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