there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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