Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
