So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize
