I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
