i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
