Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
