my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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