Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
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